Friendship Training Forums FT Family Problems

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    Trisha Stewart

    I am finding it difficult to work with Willow at feed time when there is only one biggish barn with one other horse and two ponies all in the same place waiting to be fed.

    I am sure I am not the only one with this kind of a problem. If I go elsewhere in the yard or paddocks with Willow then I have no shelter so when the weather is bad I have no choice.

    The others are not mine but I do all the food and they get fed at the same time because I don’t believe you can do one without the others, the other person just allows them to get their buckets even though they are pushing and shoving, no manners at all, so then Willow gets anxious too and whilst she will give me her kiss I feel I am never going to be able to walk the clock, have her go backwards or do anything else in this situation. I have been struggling with this for too long and apart from put up another barn which would be very expensive, any ideas? I am just not moving on at all and would like some practical ideas on what I could do please?

    Debbie Tornblom

    Where I live, most horses have no shelter, summer or winter, other than board wind screens. They are on pasture in summer, and fed big round bales in the field in winter. Rocky is most comfortable in wide open spaces, in his group.

    He, of course, would have no concept that a human had chosen him, or what might be expected of him because of that.

    It was a couple of years before he would come away from his group in the field (which could be as many as two dozen horses). I remember how frustrating that was, and how I thought I would just have to be content giving him as good a life as possible under the circumstances. I think when I accepted that, things began to change. I accepted that I could not have my own dream place, and would have to ‘grow where I was planted’. That I could be happy and grateful to have Rocky to watch over and care for, even from afar.

    I always went to see him daily if possible, regardless. In bad weather I go, even just to check to make sure he is not injured or sick. Ideas began to form in my mind based on the education about the equine that I was being referred to in Chuck’s reading list. I continued to try to figure out ways to indicate to Rocky that he was special to me.

    I know Chuck or advanced students will have the best advice for working amongst several horses. In videos, Chuck seems to do that with ease.

    I can just encourage you to trust that you will eventually be amazed to realize that you are experiencing activities and a relationship with Willow that you had not thought possible.

    Trisha Stewart

    Thanks Debbie,

    I live here, so Willow is right outside of the door or in the paddocks, they have free choice to come in or stay out and sometimes I think she takes it for granted that I am here when she wants me. Like you, recently, I have thought oh well, if that is it then so be it but then I want more out of it, I want to have that relationship I see Chuck have with his horses and I know it can be done.
    Willow will stand there for as long as she can all the time I am scratching her and doing all the things she likes, the minute I ask for front feet, she is off or if I have not scratched in the right place she gives me a dirty look.
    The feed timing is a problem because I need a special place for us to share the food and for her to learn patience and that she just does not get what she wants on demand, Chuck, I think, would agree.
    So, that was what I was referring to when I wrote about having three others with no manners and no chance of being taught any lol! What could I do that would help us. I am not really prepared to be outside doing the food when it is pouring down with rain and windy and Chuck says we need a special place.
    Hopefully he will check in on this and make some comments, it would be nice to have that, I think he will as he will see this in his inbox ha….
    Thanks Debbie.

    Louise Seaton

    Hi Trisha. Can you put up temporary fence to the barn with a gateway way so you can separate them. Leave Willow the barn side and get others on the other side, before you get the feed buckets out, then prepare feed buckets, do your prelim with Willow and as soon as you’ve given willow feed, give the others theirs (still on the other side of fence) and when they’ve all finished, open up gateway so they can get in and out. I set up temp fence with electric tape and posts and a handle thingy.

    Trisha Stewart

    Hi Louise, Interestingly enough I have done that, there is still a scrabble but its only a few days and it will take time for her to learn they cannot get to her. I primarily did this as Willow, who was here first, always had her bed area, that was trashed because of the others and she used to love to lie down in the evening when it got dark so I have done that and she can still see the others.
    So am working on that 🙂

    I don’t think Chuck is getting notifications as he has not seen this so will check on my techie to see what is happening lol!

    Chuck Mintzlaff

    You’re right! I didn’t get any notification!

    I would set up two areas. One for inclement weather, and the other for ‘normal.’ That way, you have the ‘best of both worlds.’


    Trisha Stewart

    You should do now Chuck, let us know if you dont get this reply…

    Setting up two areas is not easy as there is only 1 dry area, the rest is outside. I need a new shelter outside but I have to be able to afford that one.

    I do think it is already making a difference, she now knows they can’t get her so now I must teach her patience, other than that she does what is expected.

    Will do a video very soon now but wanted to wait until things had settled a little more.

    Chuck Mintzlaff

    GOT IT! 🙂

    Sounds like a good indicator you may not need that ‘alternate area.’

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